My love for the mother died nine years after her death. Dirty spring 198- I felt a strong feeling of indifference, scarcely I happened to think of the one that filled my life for eighteen years, and now buried under a two-meter layer of soil. I went to visit her grave without experiencing during these bleak visit anything but dull pain and aversion to death. Couple sluggish tulips on shiny from the rain tomb remained a symbol of my anguish. I blamed himself for feeling, trying unsuccessfully to cause the familiar longing for the gentle, smelling washing hands, for a knowing look and a low, husky voice. Shtudiruya Freud and Berne, I searched in vain for a new quality, which could go in my love. I still believe that only in a distant country, where there is no light, and where I still have to get there, I'll get the answers to their questions.
At the time it seemed to me that his father was plagued by similar meal. In the evening when he came home from work and laid out on the table a pack of assorted abstracts, I caught a strange sadness in his eyes, in his movements. Silently sitting in his chair, he sometimes trembled he extraneous sounds. He waited to hear the muffled clang of pots in the kitchen. We're both tired of endless anxiety for what has already happened. And I was not surprised when I heard these words from him: "Son, we decided to get married."
She was sitting in his chair with his legs crossed. I just came home from work, even without having had time to wash stubborn dirt in the palm of your hand, and foolishly hid his hands behind his back, standing on the threshold of the living room. Father got up from the sofa, or with her knees - I did not see it - to tell me the news. I mumbled greetings, and went to the bathroom, without stopping. Skoblya hand, I despised myself for not having expressed the least particle of what occurred to me as I watched her there in the living room. But posvetlevshee father's face made me think that everything in this world is justified - only to find a suitable target.
The purpose of studying in a group, he oversaw - such Tonkonog studentochki. I do not know how long have they had it started, but since the beginning of the semester father visibly perked up, and on the shelf in the bathroom appeared not cheap toilet set. Several times I have to notice that the father's gait has changed, often smacked him good wine. Obviously, he took her to a restaurant. O Lord, my father was glued to the student - a year ago, and it was difficult to imagine such a passage.
Weddings were not just at one point I put before the fact, that from now on I have to cook for three, because Tatiana - so her name - had no free time for cooking. However, this was only the dinner, breakfast in our family has not happened since ten years, and we always had dinner separately. This additional load is dumped me down, of course. At first, I quietly took her constant presence in our apartment. Probably because he was rarely at home - at the time I was a hell of extracting the concerned rather large sum of money for one ensign in the military. When my debt has been paid off, and I took a deep breath, I knocked down the disease, which was to keep me in bed for almost a month - it would seem very long, but it happened a lot during this time.
I should describe my stepmother. Short, discreet, slim girl with clear eyes. Always half-open mouth hurt a little, as if it unbearable to speak, but no one gives. Bright red thin lips. Slender graceful legs, which she did not show off above the knee, always in a black translucent stockings. Very small, almost flat chest - on this I pay attention immediately after the knees ... It's hard to say what she seduced his father. She looked up to the limit of the innocent, as if no one has climbed under her skirt - perhaps it is.
Almost all day, not counting the couple of morning lectures, she sat out the house where paced in a short blue robe, occupying adjoining room to my father's study, which was called in the family library. Father visited the Institute all day, until late at night. Sometimes they choose somewhere to be aired, I think that in a restaurant, or to a friend's father. When she was home, her college boy visited her friends and students. I they are not particularly distinguished. This scholastic fraternity at that time, I weighed.
I remained calm, until there was a fucking disease. I can not say that I relish it. Besides, I at that time had its own girl with whom I slept, though irregularly, but desperately, feasting every third night, when her mother was on duty at the hospital. As soon as I came down, our meeting ended, and a week later my flesh began to torment me.
I lay in bed for long hours, listening to the hum bitterly hormones in the blood. At night I pursued insomnia. I took valerian, passion for cognac, which is dragged from his father's bar. Somehow unnoticed worry me was this skinny bare knees. With incomprehensible speed excitement I turned into an obsession, and then it happened.
I listened to the voices behind the wall, massaging the penis and the foreskin pinching. Sometimes I got out to the kitchen, and for a long time was sitting at the table, waiting for her to take in head to look, and I will get me the necessary dose of female company. As soon as I was able to catch a glimpse of her bare calves smooth and gentle milk toes (she always went barefoot), I returned to my apartment, and rapidly released from the seed. My torment lasted for two weeks. As an addict, I was forced to increase the dose every day, trying to spy for Tatiana in the bathroom (with a disgusting sight), inadvertently become delirious in the cabinet for allegedly book and so delee. And when it became absolutely unbearable, I realized that I need a drill.
When Tatiana excused myself to the lecture, I began to drill the well. Saving power, I had enough hours to ensure that fences off in our room there was the wall with a hole a centimeter in diameter. In the library of this rather frank slit hide bookshelves. I did a little rearrangement volume and everything you need for camouflage, and finally got a window into the world of my innocent stepmother. In my room, the hole was hidden under a wall calendar. I thought of everything. I was cunning. And most importantly, I was able to do everything for her arrival.
On hearing the sound of a door opening, I lay down on the bed. My heart trembled, but it was not driving. There was a children's fear that all my tricks will be opened, and I was caught red-handed.
She came alone, took off her cloak (I heard him rustling), and went to the bathroom. The sound of running water. She took a shower. Trembling, I waited half an hour long, while she was busy in the kitchen, banging on the glass bottle (passionately fond of yogurt), slamming the door of the refrigerator. Then, finally, she left the office. Zamir delight, I clung to the secret opening. The review was lovely - a couch, chair, carpet on the floor - I had access to all the places where one could stand, sit, or lie down. She appeared in the field of view in his blue robe, wandered around the room, fumbled in her purse, pulled out a beautician. Sitting on the couch, long he painted while I devoured the eyes of her legs and neck. Then, taking off from a shelf the book and the abstract, it had fallen on the couch.
For a while I fumbled helplessly head until he ran out of gas. Nothing interesting happened. Once she reached for the handset, answering the phone, and I pulled at the sight of the pale parted thighs. But that was all. In the evening my father came, and I left the office, down the calendar in place.
At night, they made love with my father - definitely, I heard the sounds behind the wall, lying in a cold sweat, but ... could not bring myself to pry. It was a line beyond which I could not cross - I think that I can never be - this is my boundary post colored our blood - and my father.
But be that as it may, the following morning I woke up with a strained member. Behind the wall were heard noises. I pressed my ear to the wallpaper - the sounds became more distinct, but nothing definite could not catch, and I turned to the secret eye immediately.
My innocent stepmother stood in the middle of the room. She was dressed - blouse, jeans - apparently just returned from the first and last lecture. She was barefoot. Her right leg was in the hands of her guest, a friend of students, imposingly sprawled on the couch. She filed her foot like a lady pen for a kiss. Student holding a narrow white foot in one hand, it seemed, curiously looking at her, touching her fingers, stroking marble ankle. Tacky, in the morning a thick juice spilled out of me, obgazhivaya blanket inside. Before abominations pleased, I leaned back on the pillow. My body was full, but in my heart ached from the sweet pain. What was it?
Intoxicated vision white-skinned feet, I vbrel the bathroom. Rinsed his hairy crotch. Washed with a surgeon's care. Bubbles black glass glittered on the shelf, jars of cream, moisturizers with fatty ointments, deodorants - its weapon. Brushes for coloring her pale portrait. I squeezed a drop of cream on your nipple that for a moment to feel it. It does not seem to work out. Only suddenly risen member pulled the panty elastic. Well, Well, go ahead, to the greater glory.
I strode into the kitchen. Gentle wave of the hand, and a cup of coffee with his father's unfinished flying to the floor. Smithereens. The door slams, and this sweet girl is here. Alarmed eyes.
- What happened?
I devour the eyes of her baby's chin. Still look terrible in the eyes. She was in her dressing gown kindergarten. When I managed? And I have not seen - what a shame. I lead the eye down. My favorite Knees with a capital letter. I polished my view - it seems from Nabokov, a great lover of these allusions. Pozoloschenny morning sun from the window down. Maiden tender calf - my obscene Sandman.
- That's bad luck - she mutters, and funny running out toes.
Member voltage increases, and I smile.
- What are you? - Asks Tatiana, and her gaze falls on my alpenstock. - Do not break?
Her voice girlish malice. I continue to smile.
- For this you will clean itself.
She goes on a boyish, almost shaking her hips. How strange.
I'm going back to my room, and quietly, as if starting the routine work, apply to the home periscope. Detects another's dignity. Something heard from conversations, if it is good to listen. In particular, kissing sounds.
I see him kissing her neck. Such banal guy that her boyfriend. Mutters something unintelligible. Probably the vows of eternal love, damn greenhorn. I am seized by the offense. She sits next to him, touching substituting the neck, with a thoughtful looking somewhere up. He touched her breasts under the robe. She frowns. Ah, traitor. "Enough". Gets up, shakes her hair. I am a member of the fierce caress his hand, waiting for the continuation. But in vain. Something happens between them - his fierce whisper interrupted her staccato interjections. I'm not in a hurry to finish, I want to watch the movie until the end.
Doorbell. She is hiding out of sight, and it remains for me to watch the grim face of the student. It is a long time does not appear. My phallic symbol frozen in anticipation. Returned. Short altercation with a grim, and he leaves.
And here we are alone.
I lie in my bed smelling of drugs, lifeless. I decided to rest, as the neck ache from the inconvenience. From the desire ache eggs. It is behind the wall, quiet as a mouse. An hour passes. This can not go, I tell myself. But I can not do anything. My members froze, I sweat. I somehow scary and disgusting, as if in anticipation of what will happen soon.
I do not know how much time passed before I felt the movement of air. Draught cooled my heated brow. Now I knew that the door to the library opened, and Tatiana was not there. I breathe in the air, unable to move. Something has to happen.
She opened the door without knocking, and sets. Probably a long time she stood in front of the door, thinking and struggling with doubts. I do not know what prompted her then.
Her sad face. Quizzically looking at me. I lay under a blanket, without panties, my phallus emaciated uptight little pokes up, trying to lift a light blanket.
Tanya slowly, hesitantly approaches, tuck the sheets, and sits on the edge of the bed. Strange. Her reddened eyes, as if she had just been crying. Naked knee straight at my nose. Gentle feminine smell in the room. It stupefies me, as her vicious golokozhest.
- Hard for you? - She asks. Her hand on my thigh.
I do not know what to say. I can feel my eyes welling with tears. I'm twenty-two man, crying in front of a slender girl in a blue robe, my father's wife. The same invisible world tears. Tatiana takes my hand in his soft hands, gently, as if any hedgehog, and covers it with kisses. Warm lips caressing my skin. Her eyelashes the dew of tears - she, too, was crying.
- What we Reva, - she says quietly. Her eyes shining with tears, close to the mine. Her pupils are dilated. She sighs heavily, as if deciding definitively and licks my nostrils, like a dog. Then, cheeks, cheekbones, eyelids - my face is burning under her wet tongue. I breathe a faint, sour, almost lost the flavor of yogurt on her breath. Finally, she pulls away from me, but the thread between us is not cut off. We did not take his eyes from each other.
- You seriously without it, - said Tanya affirmative. She talks about my mother. She had never met.
- Now it is not - I say, morosely, weighed down by his betrayal.
It is strange sobs.
- What do you want? What?
She asked me, her voice desperate. I can not say a word, just feel out of tears century crawl. Awful - and in fact, I thought that had forgotten how to cry still in adolescence.
- Do ... do what you want, and I'm gone.
Tanya's voice becomes the hardness. She gets up and slides down robe, hiding from me her fine foot, but the alarming opening up the world of candid fainting girl's body. What, however, her thin thighs, I thought then with some detachment. Flat as cakes, chest, bulging with rosy nipples excite me as much as splashed on the pubis strip of dark fur.
Women's secret knowledge she knows what I want, and timidly approached me closer, shielding them all that I previously surroundings, enveloping me feminine odor. I take her buttocks - they are unusually resilient, like oranges - and I feel dizzy with desire to crush them in their hands until the ache in his fingers. I press my face to her belly, feeling the pulsing muscles under thin, not burdened with fat skin. "Mama"... - I'm talking about, himself without realizing it, as if in a dream. My face and her belly wet with tears. "I am your mother"- I hear it at the same time with a whimper, because she, too, was crying. As an obedient puppy, I take lick Tanya from head to toe - eagerly, panting, wiping salt, mixed with tears saliva all over her slim body - getting to gentle dimples under the knees, nude fragrant underarms, strong, tart taste of fingers on her feet. She lies down on the bed, belly down, I'm covering it from above Spreading her buttocks and sends defiant spring term in it. She screams from the sweets, and lifts the ass, so I went a little deeper. I accept the swing, arrhythmic, hard, hammering member deep as possible, holding her by the shoulders.
When I was a woman, my senses sharpened to the limit. Perhaps that is why a wild orgasmic scream my stepmother, I heard the noise of the door opening into the apartment, and then very quickly the sharp to the pain in the eyes pictures succeeded each other - Tanya, curving in languor beneath me, Tanya, in a hurry sprinkles gown, Tanya slipped out of my room in time to meet my father in the doorway, as befits a faithful wife.
But the last frame - I remember it to this day - a slim girl with wet face kissing me on the lips - soft, easy, and this is no longer the kiss of passion. And a couple of words at parting. "Until tomorrow, my son".